Queen of the Bitches
This post actually contains a story about the aforementioned Queen of the Bitches (QoB) in many parts, all in this story. Sorry for the length.
Background (all important): The store I work at is a grocery store, but they also sell a large amount of beauty and clothing. And we have a really bad loyalty card system - not how it is in regards to points or use, but it is really buggy technically, causing many problems
Part 1: Enter the QoB
Anyways, I was working a non-Express Checkout because I was told to accept anyone, even though it was an Express Checklane, and we can't turn people away anymore because of complaints.
This is when QoB came up with a big cart of clothing. It was absolutely dead, with every single cash register open, and another 2 Express Lanes, so why not, I figured.
She was dressed in really nice designer clothes, a LV bag, lots of makeup and a designer pair of sunglasses. Her friend was likewise, but less dolled up. They had all clothes and makeup. Friend quickly pays, and all is well - it seems. She quickly bags her 12 (or so) of makeup, clothing and shoes.
Then QoB comes in. She is talking on her cellphone, making it near impossible to ask her if she has the Loyalty Card and if she needs any bags.
I wait until she seems done and ask her. She ignores me and moves the phone back up to her ear and calls someone, using Siri. She then proceeds to tell her friend about the annoying boy who was asking her such a mundane question.
This was hint #1 (of infinity) that she was like Festeron - looks good on the outside, but let some darkness fall, and poodles turn into hellhounds and people into monsters.*
After she finally got off the phone, ignoring me, making me wait because we HAVE to do loyalty card first, otherwise it crashes the system and we can get in trouble if they have one and we skip it, she finally gives me her loyalty card and tells me that she will not be needing any bags.
Anything, lady; I'm thinking. "Yes, ma'am" is what I say. So I start taking off hangers and ringing items through. The total is quickly mounting up.
Part 2: The Price Check From Hell
After a while, she glances up from her phone and says that some of the prices are wrong. Quite possible, so I ask her which ones. She says "this one, that one, that one, that one and that one." Makeup, makeup, makeup (of different types) and some clothing.
So I call the price checker and ask him to go and find all these things and tell me the new price. We go through the items one at a time, and after FOREVER, as he is having some trouble finding the items and differentiating between the different types of each item (like I was).
It takes something like 20 minutes, and I really feel sorry for the price checker, because he has to run around to try and find these items. So the prices are all right, except for one, which is $3.00 off. So I call my manager.
My manager quickly comes and helps me (yay). I continue going, and soon enough, she wants more price checks. So we go through the routine again, again taking upwards of 15 minutes. No prices are wrong this time.
Part 3: Actually, I won't take that. Or maybe I will.
So after even more time, this simple transaction now dragging to over 40 minutes (aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!), she decides that she doesn't want some of her items. Her bill is well over $400 and she tells me she doesn't want this, this and this.
I take off over $200 worth of items, but then she decides she will actually have the items, all except for one $9.99 item. So on they go again.
But wait, QoB doesn't want some different items. This goes on and finally, I tell her to please make up her mind, because I am going to need so many overrides, it isn't going to be fun and will take forever and probably get me in trouble.
She calls me rude, but it works - she finally makes up her mind, and the next part of QoB starts.
Part 4: Oops, looks like I'm short...by a lot!
So finally, after nearly an hour, we finish her transaction - the scanning in of it at least. It's time to pay!
So she takes out Credit Card #1 (CC1). Doesn't work, declined. Tries again. Doesn't work, again. So she pulls out Credit Card #2, and then #3 and #4 in quick succession.
Where is she getting all these credit cards? None of them work, so she pulls out Debit Card #1. Doesn't work, so she tries Account #2. Nope, declined.
She starts getting desperate, asks me if she has any points. "No, not enough" I tell her. She grumbles and asks to try CC #1 again.
"Sure" I reply, and she tries. No, declined, but what did she expect? I ask her if she has any other method of payment, looking at the now ridiculously long receipt, because I have the lane whose messed up printer prints automatically, and not at the end, all sorted. So every put on and take off, credit/debit card try is listed. It's almost at the floor!
She looks at her friend...
Part 5: Why her friend is Really, Really, Dumb
She asks her friend "Can you pay for me?"
I barely contain my laughter. I would never, ever pay for her, and I sincerely hoped that her friend would not either.
QoB continues. "I will pay you back."
Friend: With what money? From your non-existant job? QoB: Can I help it if I am unemployed? Working sucks, and takes so much time away from shopping. Friend: So how will you pay me? QoB: My parents will pay for it.
I imagine her manipulating her parents, forcing them to pay by manipulating them emotionally and in other ways. Don't know why, but I did.
Friend: (looking suspicious) Fine, let's just get out of here. QoB: Yay! Smiles, showing off her whitey white teeth.
So Friend pays. But it is not over.
Part 6: Overrides
I was right. I need a pile of overrides. So my manger comes over, having called her over, and she quickly overrides it. Good.
But is QoB done? She tells my manager that I have been extremely rude to her. My manager doesn't believe her though. She has been watching as this transaction has dragged on over an hour.
She leaves, ignoring QoB, leaving me at the mercy of the QoB. Luckily, she didn't do too much, just asked for some bags.
Part 7: Bags, bags, oh glorious bags
Now bags are 5 cents at my store, and I tell her this. She pouts and asks if just once I can break the rule and give her like fifty bags.
I am usually ok with giving someone with lots of groceries a few extra bags if they have bought a whole pile of them. But, as she had not, I couldn't.
"No, I'm sorry, ma'am" I told her, gritting my teeth. "The bags cost five cents, but you are welcome to pay for some."
She glares at me and tells me no thanks. Then she reaches over the counter and grabs a big handful of bags. I look at her, shocked, as does her friend. Then she piles all the clothes in the cart, and runs out, yelling to her friend to meet her at the [insert name of expensive sports car, can't remember which one].
Her friend tells her that she is really sorry about QoB and hands me a dollar for the bags. I ring it in and she leaves.
Part 8: The End
I felt sorry for her friend. But not that sorry. And that is why it is now my personal policy to never, ever, accept any person over 12 items, even if told to and even if it is very quiet. Because I never want to deal with this person again.
Note: Festeron is the town in Wishbringer, the 1985 Infocom game
Part 9: Tl;Dr
Tl;Dr: Spoiled b***h comes in and causes havic at my till for upwards of an hour, causing me extreme aggravation because of her pure evilness towards retail clerks, causing Extreme PriceChecks, multiple credit cards which decline and how her friend got scammed by forementioned lady.
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